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Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
Oh, no, absolutely not, no. His butt's too big. I need a butt, not a birdbath.
- Jefferson Porger
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Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
Hell no. Please leave the room... butt first.
- Jefferson Porger -
Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
If you believed in yourself half as much as I do, you'd be on the moon right now.
- Tim Cramblin -
Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
I just believe in you. Why don't you get out of my friggin' ass?
- Tim Cramblin -
Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
It's girls only. And no, we're not that way.
- Sheila Portnadi -
Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
Back in the office when I said, "We're not that way," it was funny, because you are gay, and we both knew it, and neither of us is a bigot.
- Sheila Portnadi -
Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
I'm sitting there with my girl watching TV, all of a sudden, you come out of nowhere. I'm like, "Oh, shit, baby." I know him." She was like, "Bullshit." I'm like, "Bitch, get out." "Get your shit and get out of my house now. You don't tell me who I know." But you killed it.
- Ned -
Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
Lea, do you know any Polish jokes? (No.) 'Cause I'm Polish. And it's okay if you said them, because, you know, I'm Polish, and I know you know it. That's why it's funny.
- Sheila Portnadi -
Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
Here's one. How many Poles does it take to screw in a light bulb? (How many?) Five. Because four of them are putting it in the wrong hole. Nope, because it's all right. There is no wrong hole. You could put it in any hole you want. It doesn't matter. I'm not a bigot.
- Sheila Portnadi -
Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
Quintin, can we have two vodkas and one beer for my chubby little friend here?
- Sam Duvet -
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Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
I know that you're tired, but why do I have to go to bed?
- Tim Cramblin -
Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
"Mr. Groove wears a fedora and pulls it off great."
- Sam Duvet -
Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
I'm sorry. I just don't want you to think I'm racist against gays just because I'm old.
- Sheila Portnadi -
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Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
Who's a weird old man? Me? How am I old or weird?
- Tim Cramblin -
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Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
Hey, kids, if this wasn't a commercial, this was real life, and I came up to you in a teen club, would you dance with me?
- Tim Cramblin -
Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
That was the commercial that led to the shutdown of Boom teen nightclub earlier today, where a swarm of middle-age men were arrested for posing as teens attempting to gain entry. When asked what they were doing, the men said, "Mr. Groove sent us." Between you and me, it seems like that commercial was telling old me how to sneak into a teen club.
- Mort Crim -
Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
Yeah, no, I know. Like, you know, I thought Mr. Groove was a terrible idea. But then I got in front of camera, and I became a friggin' pedo.
- Sam Duvet -
Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
Yeah, thanks, bud, and actually, he wasn't even. He actually became young Mr. Groove. He wasn't, like, old guy in a young guy's body. He became a kid.
- Sam Duvet -
Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
Oh, come on. I got to get me into Boom. Oh, pretty please, make me a teen.
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Jefferson Porger, Season: 2, Ep: 2meme it
One little fishy. Two little fishies. Three little fishies. Jackass.
- Sheila Portnadi -
