Detroiters Quote Database

• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  So then the guy comes in the store soaking wet, looks straight to camera and goes, "Um, I'd like to buy a kayak."

  - Tim Cramblin
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  Don't let making a living interfere with making a life.

  - Sebastian
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  Oh, uh, that's just the shape of my face, sir.

  - Tim Cramblin
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  It's just how I look, sir, how my skull is.

  - Tim Cramblin
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  For real? Hey, they gon' 100% suck your dicks with these new ones, man, I'm telling you. Listen to this. Ready for this?

  - Ned
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  Hefty garbage bags: Now, for white people.

  - Ned
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  You guys done jerking each other off?

  - Lea
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  Do you see jizz everywhere, Lea?

  - Tim Cramblin
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  I'm about four or five seconds from wilin'.

  - Tim Cramblin
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  Oh, I guess I had a dumb blonde moment.

  - Sheila Portnadi
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  I hope y'all ready for this shit, man. This shit is coming out of the idea oven hot and fresh.

  - Ned
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  He looks back at the camera and says, "Diapers. They can hold a man's piss."

  - Ned
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  Chyron: Reeboks. He dead.

  - Ned
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  He just, boop, dropping holes in the butter. Boop, dropping holes in the butter. Boop, dropping holes in the butter... Dick holes.

  - Ned
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  It's almost like a Benjamin Franklin neck. You kind of got a Benjamin Franklin whole head.

  - Ned
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  And plus my crotch is throbbin' for a rocket.

  - Sam Duvet
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  Oh. My crotch is achin' for one!

  - Tim Cramblin
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  But I'm white!

  - Dale Diebenkorn
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  Guys, guys, guys. Don't leave me half-hard here.

  - Sebastian
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  I honestly thought my dancing was sexy.

  - Tim Cramblin
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  Hello, mother...

  - Sheila Portnadi
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  Good-bye, Mother.

  - Sheila Portnadi
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  I am scared every second on that thing.

  - Tim Cramblin
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  Why would they make something that does that?

  - Tim Cramblin
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  But I found I like my ideas better as ideas. You know, 'cause once the money gets involved, is it even art anymore?

  - Ned
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  I had a guy put his dick in the ice cream.

  - Ned
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  But they're wrong!

  - Ned
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  Ta-da!

  - Tommy Pencils
  

  

  
• Hog Riders, Season: 1, Ep: 2

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  Yeah, I like how you captured my little corn cob mouth. And my raccoon mask, and my gray, gray skin. Yellow ears. (Yellow nose, too.) And my double chin. Make sure you got the double chin perfectly. Yeah, no, I see it, man. I see it. Pube hair, pube eyebrows. My whole goblin face.

  - Tim Cramblin